Full Frontal Read online

  Owen was nervous from the moment he walked in the club. He barely responded to Austin’s greeting. The bouncer was a cool guy, and his massive bulk was well beyond Owen’s goal. They sometimes traded tips on bodybuilding. Tonight, Owen’s mind was only on one body.

  He was going to ask Cooper to jack off with him. Or to hook up with him. He couldn’t settle on one option or the other. Jacking off together was so casual, Cooper would be sure to say yes. But what if they went through with it and Cooper wanted to stop there? Owen might be more frustrated than ever.

  His mind spun with the possibilities as he walked through to the change room. If Cooper said yes to jacking off, he’d definitely say yes to more. The only question was if Owen was ready for more.

  Before he pushed the door open, he steeled himself. If Cooper was alone in there, this would be his chance. He let out a breath when he saw the change room was full. It looked like all the guys were there, including Cooper.

  Owen avoided Cooper’s eyes as he headed for his locker. He couldn’t avoid the other guys’ questions, though.

  “Hey, you didn’t come to Ace’s last night,” Gabriel said. “We missed you there.”

  “Sorry. Had stuff to do.”

  Lev swiveled in front of his locker, butt-naked aside from his shoes. “He probably had a customer to take care of. Extra-special care, that is.”

  Although Owen winced, he kept his voice even. Neither confirm nor deny it. “Something like that.”

  He got out of there as soon as possible. Luckily, the few customers that night were the same type of party girls as usual. He could deal with them without even thinking about it. The pervy older women were even easier. As long as he was good-looking and turned on the charm, there was no need for him to be quick-witted.

  After a turn onstage, he headed back to the change room and put his clothes in his locker. Just as he was closing the lock, Cooper appeared behind him.

  “Hey,” Cooper said.

  Owen’s heart pounded. He finally had his chance. He hadn’t even seen Cooper coming – hadn’t even been able to prepare for this. “Hey.”

  “You doing all right tonight? I wanted to check on you.”

  Owen fingered the lock, wondering if he could pull the vodka out again. He suspected Cooper wouldn’t approve of that. Well, they’d taken one shot together last night. It wouldn’t be too out of place. He took the bottle out and took a swig, then offered it to Cooper. To his surprise, the guy didn’t even hesitate before taking it.

  “I’m all right,” Owen said. Somehow Cooper looked even better now. He let his eyes roam over his body for a moment, temporarily forgetting that Cooper could see exactly what he was doing. He was almost embarrassed when he met Cooper’s eyes again. But there was something in the way Cooper was looking at him, too.

  “Yeah, it takes a lot of thinking,” Cooper said. He had that big brother voice again, which made Owen realize that it had slipped away for a minute. “I remember when I first came out. I was almost twenty. That’s pretty late these days, you know. A lot of these guys came out in their teens. Maybe I can understand you better than them.”

  “I’m not really at the point where I need understanding,” Owen said. “I don’t think I’m going to come out or anything. It’s just within the last few days or so, I’ve been a little…”

  He trailed off, but Cooper understood. “Curious.” Owen nodded. “Yeah, I get it. That’s how it starts.”

  Owen took another sip of vodka, almost forgetting that he was still at work. It felt like this conversation was happening somewhere far away from the strip club. Even though they were still in their familiar surroundings, the intensity of it made him feel like they could be anywhere else.

  Besides, he needed that liquid courage right now. “It feels like more than curiosity,” Owen said softly. “It’s like I’m so horny. It’s so intense. I’ve never felt so strongly about sex before. I just want to try it. It’s like if I don’t, I don’t know what I’ll do.”

  Cooper shifted slightly, and Owen resisted the urge to glance down at his cock. He was dying to see if he was actually having an effect on Cooper. If only there was some way for him to peek without his coworker seeing him look.

  “I get what you mean,” Cooper said. “I felt like that at first, too. I’d been trying to force attraction to women for the first twenty years of my life. When I allowed myself to want who I actually wanted, it felt like everything was finally falling into place. Of course it was going to be intense.”

  “I don’t know if you quite get what I mean,” Owen said. “I can’t see you being like this. It’s like I’m out of control.”

  “Sure, sure, I was like that.”

  Owen wished Cooper was still like that now. That would make this so much easier. Still, the idea that Cooper had ever felt the way he was feeling was powerfully arousing. He imagined a younger Cooper sitting alone or lying in bed, touching himself until he had the incredible kind of climaxes that Owen had been having. The thought of Cooper masturbating was enough to get blood flowing to his cock.

  “You don’t seem that sexual,” he said. “I guess it’s because of that big brother thing you have going on. But you must be. I mean, we all are…”

  “Yeah, of course I’m sexual. I get horny. I had a boyfriend up to a year ago.”

  “You wouldn’t be interested in…” Owen trailed off again, even the vodka wasn’t enough to get the words out of him. “In…” He faltered. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t propose this idea to another man. Lifting the vodka to his lips, he took another sip. The small bottle was almost drained. It wasn’t going to help him get this idea out.

  “In what, Owen?”

  Owen bit his lip and dropped his gaze… or started to. As his eyes moved down to the ground, he caught a glimpse of Cooper’s half-erection on the way. Cooper did want him.

  “In experimenting with me,” he said, still staring at the floor. “Or, I guess, in helping me experiment.” He paused, suddenly scared to continue. “Maybe jacking off together, or… never mind. Just jacking off together.”

  Cooper was silent. Owen couldn’t look up to see him. He couldn’t bear to see his face. It was going to be a no. It had to be. Earlier he’d figured some mutual masturbation wouldn’t be a big deal. Now he didn’t know how he’d ever hoped Cooper might accept.

  Of course Cooper wouldn’t want to do something like that. Owen was out of his mind to even think about it, never mind suggest it. Everything was going to be fucked up now. How could he come back to work after saying something like that?

  When Owen finally managed to lift his eyes to Cooper’s face, the guy just looked confused. Owen could see that he’d thrown him off, and he felt bad for making Cooper feel that way. Finally the guy spoke. “I don’t think that would be a good idea,” he said. “I don’t hook up with coworkers. I worked with my ex at my last job, and we were all friends and everything. The breakup was messy… very messy. It was bad enough that I had to quit. That’s when I started working here.”

  “Okay, I get it,” Owen said. “Sorry to ask.”

  “No, it’s okay,” Cooper said. “It was fair of you to ask. Any of the other guys might be interested. You’re lucky enough to be surrounded by a whole group of gay, horny guys. Why don’t you try asking Lev? Or maybe Elijah?”

  Frowning, Owen shook his head. He had no attraction to either of them. Elijah was too much of a bad boy, and Lev was way too flamboyant. He didn’t want any other guys, anyway. He just wanted Cooper.

  But he wasn’t going to tell him that. That would have freaked him out way more than he already had. “I’ll think about it,” he said at last.

  “All right. I’m going to go back out there. I guess you should, too. We don’t have to talk about what you just asked. We can forget that it ever happened.”

  “That sounds good.”

  “And the offer to talk about things still stands. I’m here for you.”

  “Cool.”

  Owen watched h
im leave, regretting that things hadn’t gone a little differently. He took another drink, finishing the bottle of vodka. Then he headed back into the club.

  Twelve

  The customer licked her lips as she slipped a bill into Cooper’s armband. Her wrinkled fingers fumbled on the elastic, but she managed to get it in on the second try. Cooper gave her the sincerest smile that he could. It was always a little strange to strip for women around his grandmother’s age. He felt like he should be sitting on their laps, not giving them a lap dance.

  “You look wonderful tonight,” she said. “I like how you boys are getting naked now. Gives me a chance to check out your package.”

  “Thank you, ma’am.”

  He sat across the chair’s arms, giving her the full view without putting his weight on her. She had to be the first customer to say anything positive about the new dress code. Every other woman who’d said anything had voiced complaints. Trenton just stuck to his belief that it would be popular if they gave it enough time.

  Now that the customer had made that comment, Cooper was sure she’d been here before. He couldn’t put his finger on her name, or anything about her.

  “You seem a bit out of sorts,” she said. “Last time you’d gotten my entire life story by this point. Tonight, it’s hardly a hello and how are you.”

  “Well, I do apologize.” He grabbed her hand and raked it down his chest, knowing the thrill would be enough to put all her grievances out of her mind. To his satisfaction, she let out a small gasp.

  Her story was coming back to him now – she was a widow with two grown children that hardly visited. She’d remarked several times on how when her husband was alive, his body couldn’t compare to Cooper’s.

  “It was nice to see you again, Greta,” he said as he lifted off her. “I’m afraid I have to leave you now. I should take a turn onstage, but one of my coworkers will be with you in a moment if you’d like some company.”

  “Always,” she said, fondling her small stack of bills.

  Cooper kicked himself as he made his way to the change room. He should have remembered those details earlier. He really was out of sorts tonight. After he got a few articles of clothing back on, he got on the stage.

  The song started. He grabbed the pole, lifting off the ground in order to spin around it. He stopped in the middle of the spin and arched his back into the air. There were a few scattered bits of applause. Although his dancing was decent tonight, the place was too empty for anyone to appreciate it. And he was too distracted to care.

  Owen was still on his mind. He was only a little surprised that he’d been able to figure out the guy was having trouble with his sexuality. He’d always had a knack for figuring out things like that. It was funny that he hadn’t picked up on Owen’s vibes earlier.

  The proposition had certainly flattered him, and he couldn’t help but wonder what would have happened if he’d accepted. Would Owen have gone through with it? What exactly would he have been up for? He doubted that they would have had full-on sex when Owen was a gay virgin. Cooper slid down the pole to the floor and then did another spin on his knees. It had been so long for him, he would have been happy with just about anything.

  He had definitely been tempted when Owen had propositioned him, and he still debated whether he had made a mistake by saying no. He had been startled, for one thing. It had pretty much come out of nowhere… although if he was honest with himself, the heat in that room had been rising well before that question.

  There was definitely something between him and Owen. But as the guy had said, he was supremely horny in general lately. It wasn’t anything more than that. Cooper wouldn’t fool himself into thinking they had some kind of special connection.

  Getting up from his knees, he hooked his thumbs into his briefs. He still had a tiger print G-string on underneath, and when he kicked the briefs aside, he turned around and shook his ass at the crowd.

  The G-string didn’t cover up much, but it was just enough to tease the women in the audience. They could see pretty much all of him, but not quite. The dance was enough to get them looking at him. They couldn’t help but want more.

  After another turn on the pole, he took off the thong. Stripping down to nothing was feeling more natural every time he did it. He could see why this would feel funny for Owen. If he was in the closet, or trying to figure out his sexuality, this would be just about the weirdest place to do it.

  He looked away quickly. That guy was so sexy, and if things were different, Cooper would have given his left nut to have a chance with him. In truth, it wasn’t even about them being coworkers. It was working for Ace and Gabriel, after all. If things blew up the way they had with Xavier, he could live through it. The chance of being with Owen was worth the risk of what might happen.

  But he liked Owen too much to be his experiment. The guy was his bro. If Owen was actually gay, he would date him in a heartbeat. Since he wasn’t sure, they had to just be friends. Maybe if Owen ever figured out his sexuality, there could be something between them. But judging from what he’d said back in the change room, he wasn’t inclined to do that.

  After what felt like forever, Cooper climbed down from the stage. He was conscious that he had performed worse than usual, and he promised himself that he would do better on his next turn. He couldn’t keep thinking of Owen all the time like this. Given that the club’s sole straight guy had just propositioned him, he was willing to cut himself a little slack.

  It figured that Owen was the first person to catch his eye on his way down. His only choice was to walk by him. As he passed Owen, he saw the guy glance down at his dick. Owen was clearly fascinated by it. Cooper could understand that. He loved dick too, but if he was just figuring out his sexuality, he would have been wildly uncomfortable in an environment like this.

  So Cooper was pleased that Owen liked his body. But the fact remained that he would only be an experiment to him. Just being near the guy could almost get him hard… but Owen was still the club’s forbidden fruit.

  He was going to walk by him, but he had a thought that made him pause. Stopping and laying a friendly hand on Owen’s shoulder, his touch quickly became more than friendly. He had to fight again to keep from getting hard. Getting a boner in the middle of the room would be difficult to explain.

  Although he removed his hand, he put his lips next to Owen’s ear. Brilliant idea. This was just as bad. He kept his whispered words short. “Listen… if you want to hook up with one of the guys, I’ll talk to them for you.”

  Owen frowned. “What?”

  “Yeah,” Cooper said, even more pleased with his idea. “I can play matchmaker. I won’t even tell them that it’s you. I’ll keep it discreet, and you won’t even have to talk to them yourself.”

  “I don’t get it.”

  “Tell me which one of the guys you want,” Cooper said, starting to get frustrated by Owen’s obliviousness. “Which of them you want to experiment with. I’ll tell them that one of the other guys wants to hook up with them. No one but me will know that you’re curious. If or when the guy says yes, I’ll tell him it’s you, and you guys can fool around as much as you want.”

  Owen stared at him, and Cooper began to wish he had picked a more private location for this offer. “What if the guy I pick doesn’t want me?”

  “Any of them would want you. You’re everything a guy could ask for.”

  “You didn’t want me.”

  Cooper put his hands on his sides, trying to hook his thumbs through nonexistent fabric again. Owen sounded almost accusing, but Cooper hadn’t done anything wrong. He was just sticking to the rule he had made ages ago. The rule made sense, and he refused to abandon it. Not even for Owen. Cooper knew from experience how badly these things could go. He liked this job. He wouldn’t let this workplace explode around him for the sake of his hard-on.

  “That was different,” he said. “I’m sure any of the others would be happy to help you out.”

  As subtly as he could, he
looked again at Owen’s body. He eyed his chest, his arms, his cock… He just wished he could see him with an erection. He swallowed, realizing he was almost drooling at the sight of the guy. So much for being subtle about this.

  He looked back up at Owen’s face, which was almost unbelievably handsome. In the dim light of the club, the shadows reflecting off him made him look even more appealing. He was honestly one of the hottest guys Cooper had ever seen. He usually avoided comparing people, but he had to admit that Owen looked even better than Xavier.

  If Owen was anyone but a coworker, he would’ve hooked up with him in a heartbeat. He was definitely good-looking enough to make Cooper rethink his rule about hook-ups. If he was out of the closet, Cooper would probably have made an exception. But Owen was both. It was a surefire drama bomb.

  He swallowed again. If only Owen was more than just curious.

  “So, what do you think?” he asked, trying his hardest to keep his voice neutral. “Do you want me to do that?”

  It took a second for Owen to reply. He was clearly considering all aspects of the offer. Cooper’s stomach twisted. Why had he thought this would be a good idea? Now that he was picturing it, he hated the idea of Owen fooling around with any of the strippers at the club. Could he seriously go through with this if Owen said yes?

  At last, Owen spoke. “No,” he said. “That’s okay. I don’t think I’m quite ready for it.”

  Cooper heaved a sigh of relief. He wasn’t ready. That meant Cooper had made the right decision by saying no to him, too. He wasn’t going to hook up with Owen and have the guy regret it. If anything ever happened between them, he wanted them both to feel good about it.

  “All right,” he said. “Let me know if you change your mind.”

  His smile felt a little too fake. He didn’t know why he was trying to act so calm about this. He was practically pushing Owen to hook up with one of the other guys. Why couldn’t he just leave well enough alone? Why keep insisting on trying to help?

  Owen gave him a tight smile back. He reached out to punch him on the shoulder. That brief contact left Cooper tingling again. What was happening to him? This “straight” guy had him all worked up.